Do I Need a Life Coach?
By Sheri and Derek Green
March 28, 2021
Nourish has always been an ardent fan of this duo, who bring love, energy, and understanding on how to break chronic patterns in our thoughts; and who highlight the actions that can hold us back. We have asked Sheri and Derek Green to join forces with Nourish, and explain in greater detail, exactly what coaching is. Over the coming weeks, we will publish some great advice from these beautiful people, focusing on how best to work through the many issues we all face daily.
Hello and welcome - we’re so glad you’re here! This past year has been extremely challenging for so many. It has shone a spotlight on our lives as we’ve quarantined, and had to distance ourselves from friends, our communities, and even from our families. We’ve worked from home, schooled our children from home and spent more time with our spouses, children and ourselves, more fully and intimately than ever before. And quite honestly, it’s brought up a lot of “stuff.” Stuff that has forced us to take a long hard look at our lives, our relationships, and our level of happiness and success…. about everything. We may find that now we’re feeling STUCK — overwhelmed, sad, frustrated, angry, lethargic, unmotivated, uninspired or lost. It brings us to a place where we’re asking ourselves two very serious and pointed questions: Is this really where I want to be? And how do I get from where I am now to “there”?
Well, what does “there” even look like?
Coaching helps driven people, who are looking to reach new levels of success and fulfillment in their lives, get to where they are trying to go - uncover their life’s purpose, change career paths, find love, lose weight, make more money, be more consistent with self-care, stop procrastinating. You name it. We help them remove the roadblocks that are thwarting them getting to their ideal place, in their lives and careers.
As life begins to resume in this new post-pandemic world, and after much contemplation, you make the bold decision to find answers, because honestly… you need things to change. You’ve heard about therapy. Almost everyone you know has seen a therapist at some point in their lives. You sort of know the difference between a mentor and a consultant, and there are your friends who you talk to about everything. But what do you need? The better question is, what do you want? Let’s quickly break down the differences, so we’re on the same page.
Therapy. The focus of therapy is to explore the past, in order to understand the present. The therapist helps the client by figuring out “why.” Therapy dives into deep-seated emotional issues, to work on personal trauma recovery. Therapists help clients fix problems, manage emotions and past issues, and sometimes manage mental illness. Therapy tends to be for people with some level of dysfunction or disorder that is creating blocks, prohibiting them from functioning in their relationships, careers and establishing self-care. That being said, while many people require the support of a therapist, they work with coaches at the same time. The therapist is there to help them to manage and come to terms with their past, and their coach is partnering with them to plan and execute their future goals and dreams.
Clients who are best served by a coach are starting at a well-functioning place in their lives. They’re surviving in their lives, in their relationships and careers, but not thriving. The purpose of the coaching relationship is to create awareness around what’s happening in the present, so that the client can move into the future with more clarity, purpose, excitement and sustainable success. Through visioning, setting goals and being held accountable, the clients can improve and develop in all areas of their lives, beyond their wildest dreams. The coach identifies the client’s ‘why’ (why am I in this spot) but the focus is on the ‘how’ to move forward, and the ‘what’s next’, to develop sustainable actions and results.
Mentors have a life experience in what you’re trying to do. They have ‘been there, done that.’ Mentors can be role models who can show you the ropes, and give you advice based on their own experiences, and what has worked for them.
Coaches do not use their personal experiences as a model of success for their clients. Coaches know that the clients are experts in their own lives, as everyone’s life experience is unique to them. The coach is the expert in the coaching process, helping the client to become super clear about what they want, support them, be 100% non-judgmental, and be the catalyst that finally gets them unstuck and into an action-result mode. The coach is able to help the client, even without firsthand knowledge of what the client has experienced.
Consultants have an agenda and promote themselves as experts in certain aspects of life. They will offer their clients advice, based on what they specialize in, and have personally experienced.
A coach’s only agenda is to get clients to where they want to be. They can be experts in certain areas, but their true expertise is in the coaching process. They know clients have, within them, the answers to all their questions. And although coaches may offer new ideas from their own intuition, knowledge and experience, they partner with the client to develop a plan, and implement it. They help bring about effective change and do whatever they can to hold their clients accountable to move forward and have sustainable growth.
Friends, as valuable as they are, usually have their own subjective agenda and can be judgmental. They love to give advice and may not recognize, or be willing to call out, the core issues that are causing you pain and unhappiness.
Coaches are objective and non-judgmental. They are trained professionals who are trusted to work on the most important aspects of a client’s life, without giving personal advice. Their relationship is a partnership solely fueled by what the client wants and needs. Coaches will boldly point out issues to be worked on and are trained to challenge their clients in a supportive way and keep them accountable so they effectively move towards their goals.
Are all coaches the same? Simply put, no! The industry has been one of the fastest growing in the last several years. Some coaches are certified, (some not), and some specialize in one niche or another, like relationship coaching, transitions coaching, mindset coaching and business coaching, to name but a few. At Soul Food Coaching, we use the Core Energy Coaching Process. While many coaches’ main goal is to get their client from point A to B, as Energy Coaches, we want to first understand WHY the client wants to get from A to B. WHY is that goal important? For example, if a client wants to change careers, we need to first ask questions, and peel back the layers of feelings, to get to the core of why they desire that change. Once we understand the ‘why’, we can focus on the “WHAT’S NEXT”, which is where clients find their power in choice and decision making.
What’s the bottom line? Find a coach with whom you really click. It’s such a personal relationship, and one that can change your life in the most amazing ways. Most coaches offer complimentary mini-sessions where you can ask questions, discuss your goals and see if there’s a fit. If their style of coaching and techniques align with what you feel you need, the next step is to discuss what a coaching relationship looks like and go from there.
Asking for help, and finding support, so you can finally reach your goals and dreams, is the best investment you could ever make. You are worth it!
Sheri Green is a certified professional coach in addition she is an energy leadership index master practitioner. A mother to 3 wonderful young adults and wife to Derek her partner for over 3o years. Sheri has helped many find their right path in life and is a very sound force to rely upon.
Derek Green has devoted a big part of his life in finding his voice and feeling comfortable in his identity. His background and upbring, not always allowing him to shine. He has fully embraced all that life has taught him. An amazing Dad and husband, he has rendered his beliefs and experiences in helping others, especially connecting well to young adults who he finds he holds a strong connection and level of trust.